Tuesday, January 3, 2012
Happy New Year!
I honestly don't know what to say. That's exactly when you shouldn't update your blog, isn't it? ;)
Obviously, this has been the longest hiatus I have taken from the blog since I began it back in the late summer of 2009. In between blog posts on the subjects I usually address here, I posted several updates in 2011 of a more personal nature, which is exactly the kind of thing I shy away from. However, because of that unofficial "rule" that I have about not posting the personal stuff, this blog ended up being pretty sparse on posts in 2011. That's because 2011 was a pretty emotional year for me & my family.
Most of you know that our newborn son got really sick in September. Those of you that know me well know exactly how sick, & know about the battles&setbacks we've faced in the last few months. Many of those hurdles have been related to our son's health.
That being said, please know that my absence from the blog does not mean that I have been depressed, or even that life hasn't been going on.
(Though perhaps going on a bit less organized. My Type A rep has taken a hit!)
There have been so many wonderful memories made in between these low points we've hit!
Our faith has been tested, but I believe I have come through the last year with my faith possibly stronger than it ever has been before. I have certainly experienced a very real connection with God during some of these highs&lows I've faced.
I can certainly understand why so many marriages suffer when a family adds the special management of a child's health to all of the other everyday stresses we all face. I am so, so blessed to say that throughout every single bump in the road we've faced, My Prince & I have strengthened our bond & acknowledged how very grateful we are to have one another
in good times & in bad,
for richer or poorer,
in sickness & in health,
'til death do us part.
Also, a couple of cliches proved true for me in 2011:
You find out who your friends are.
(& sometimes you find you've taken some for granted...& sometimes you find you've perhaps been putting a bit too much effort into others. It's another one of those "growing up" things, I think, that it becomes easier to let go of the ties that aren't strong enough to hold through the hard times.)
...when it rains, it pours.
But personally, I found that the harder it rained, the more easily I adapted to finding ways to make the cold & the wet seem sunny&warm!
In fact, a lot of people have asked me, "How on earth do you stay so positive?" Well, I just do. You can't change these kinds of things, & there is certainly more power in positive thinking than in wallowing in self-pity. & even when My Little Man was very sick, I also had to be a good mama to a beautiful little girl who adores her baby brother, & I would never want to allow my own worries to affect her.
My Little Man is doing well today.
He will always see specialists,
& he will always have some things that need to be monitored,
& God knows I will always be worried to death about him.
But he is a chubby, smiley little cherub; & he is developmentally perfect on all of the cognitive&physical charts. Were it not for the miracles of advanced modern medicine, nobody would even know anything had ever been wrong!
(Although I am not comfortable disclosing any more details, since this is still very much a public blog, & My Little Man has an incredibly rare condition; please feel free to email me if you want to know more. I certainly consider many of you friends & am not intentionally shrouding myself in mystery from those of you!)
Please forgive me...
...if I have not replied to your email at all;
...or if I have taken weeks to respond to your Twitter request.
Please forgive me...
...if I haven't kept up with your blog, which I probably love & miss reading!
...or if you generously offered me some fantastic gift or blog giveaway, & I never even got around to replying to you.
Truthfully, there have been many times in the last few months when I have begun composing in my head some kind of "signing off" or "taking a break" blog post. But each time something prevented me from doing it, even when I felt like I was too emotionally detached from this blog to continue to try to put any kind of heart into it.
Now, after making one of those silly New Year's resolutions to blog more, I've been trying to figure out how to go about it.
Do I just jump right back in, pretending as though nothing personal ever happened to the author of this blog?
Do I delete this blog & start over someplace else?
Do I just go to the email account associated with this blog & "mark all unread?"
Well, I just couldn't bear to do any of those, & so I've spent the last couple days scrolling through emails&messages...& my heart has just been bursting at the outpouring of love from my beautiful blogfriends. THANK YOU.
(I've also been humbled to have some of the most awesome bloggers, & folks from some of the most awesome companies, share words of encouragement&praise! Thank you!)
& so with all of that love, I am beginning 2012 with a big smile & a heartfelt appreciation for all that this "impersonal" blog has personally done for me.
I have no idea where this year will take this blog...
...but I am overjoyed to have you along for the ride.